11/11/2023, 11:20 a.m.
Oh my god, my website is ready to go live and my heart is pounding for no reason LOL. I'm absurdly proud of something so simple and honestly a lil busted. I hope y'all like it.
My work-anniversary went really well, I was right to broadcast two nights in a row to catch people who couldn't show up the first night! I have gotten too into the habit of giving myself "one chance" and then bailing when I think I've flopped lmao. As it turns out, making yourself available results in people talking to you! If only I had learned this sooner! Actually, I'm still actively learning it!
In any case, it was so uplifting to come back to usernames I recognize, plus new folks who pour in like "wow are you new?", which tickles me to no end! I felt so appreciated and I was so happy to have the social interaction. I don't go out and talk to people very much, so the practice is SORELY needed. And I really do need to broadcast more. (Probably more for my health than y'all's at this point, lmao)
I'll be traveling a little for the holidays, which always throws me off, but I'll do what I can to get back to normal video uploads. Really hoping to sneak some camming in there too.
10/18/2023, 1:44 a.m.
Today Boypaws and I went thrifting! We found some great pieces for our (secret) Halloween cosplay plans, and I spent a couple of hours dyeing his costume pieces, then spray-dyeing mine. The clothes I sprayed are hanging in the bathroom right now. There's black dye all over them, and it's threatening to get all over me, Boypaws, and everything we own. But the spray effect is so cool, I just hope I can rinse everything without losing all the little splatters and fun details I've gotten attached to. *aggressively crosses fingers* I also found a cute vase in which to display the fake flowers **** gave me! (Eagle-eyed fans will know who I'm referring to here; everyone else, I promise I'll divulge soon!)
My back hurts from hunching over the sink like a little Igor, and my hands are super dry from washing them repeatedly after getting dye all over my fingertips (oops). I'm shooting a werewolf vid tomorrow, so I'm just fortunate the dye didn't ruin my manicure lmao! Safe!
I also added a few videos to my HelloCatpaws queue, finally. I abandoned everything for over a month after having a big panic attack on September 1st, then I started therapy and medication (Abilify!), and now I'm trying to access whatever a normal work schedule is once again. While busting ass to complete 4 costumes before Halloween, then broadcasting at least once to celebrate my 11 year work anniversary.
11 years! It doesn't feel real! I guess I'm technically smarter and more experienced, and I know my output has improved marginally, but I don't feel as super-capable as I hoped I would way back in the day. My brain is whispering, "A series of expensive work purchases would fix all this!" but I know I just have to get back to basic consistency before goin' nuts on the expenses.
11 years...!
10/17/2023, 5:52 a.m.
I definitely stayed up past bedtime trying to figure out this damn Neocities thing. Naturally I'm extremely excited about some silly shit that might not resonate with other folks, but part of me hopes at least somebody likes it! If not, well hey, I always wanted to make my own Geocities, and now I have. :)